Odds and Ends - Valentine’s Day Edition

• I’d love to see the C-Span ratings for yesterday, I’d imagine they have probably never been higher. There is so much interest in Roger Clemens’ alleged PED usage, and ridiculously so.  Henry Waxman’s ridiculous intro on the reasons for having McNamee and Clemens appear seemed more appropriate for a Saturday Night Live skit.  And the ensuing, clear split of opinion between Democrats and Republicans and their treatment of the “star” witnesses gave everyone a glimpse of how partisanship trumps common sense in the United States Congress.
• Having said that, clearly both McNamee and Clemens are outright liars - and only one of them is admitting it. There are two points that stand out to me regarding Clemens, both regarding HGH usage. First, the testimony of Andy Pettite, and Clemens using terms like “misheard” and “misremembered” regarding Pettite’s disclosures.  Second, who in the flying fuck believes that McNamee would give an injection of HGH to Clemens’ wife without Roger Clemens’ knowledge?  Asinine and ridiculous.  The only question left is whether McNamee or Clemens will face perjury charges - I’d have to imagine not, and the whole thing fades away for a bit.  If Clemens decides to pitch this year, it will certainly pop back up, and I have my doubts he wants to deal with that nonsense.
• Hillary Clinton is becoming increasingly desperate as the last few bastions of her strongest support (Latino and women voters) are increasingly chipped away by Barack Obama.  She would love to seat the Florida and Michigan delegates at the convention, a thought that must give Howard Dean nightmares.  Additionally, she wants more debates, and not just because she’s a strong debater, but it gives her the free face time her money-starved campaign needs.  If Obama is smart, he will defer on the debate and delegates question.  I love the fact that he is already taking on McCain - proudly acting like the front-runner for the nomination.  It’s looking more and more that he has a real shot at winning Texas (unthinkable a few weeks back), and if he does so and keeps Ohio and Pennsylvania close, Clinton may have to spit the bit.  If not, the Democratic Convention will look like a civil war battleground before all is said and done.
• Reggie Theus has done an admirable job with the Kings this season, but there are still so many times he’s looked the part of a rookie coach.  He has been exposed repeatedly in late game situations, and last night’s game against the Rockets was such a time - not using the extra foul he had in his pocket on the last Rockets’ offensive possession was bad enough, but the final Kings’ attempt was a poorly drawn play with very little chance of succeeding.  Let’s hope that part of Theus’ coaching ability improves over time.   Oh, and good to see you Justin Williams. 
• There’s gonna be a lot of Mavericks fans pissed off at Devean George, but why would anyone expect a player in his position to just give up their potential Bird rights?  Most likely, he will never get to use them, but his agent is smart to advise him not to give it up without a fight.
• Oh, and thanks to Kusian for the heads up on John McCain’s daughter.  Yes, she’s a very nice!  /borat off
• I still won’t vote for him.>

Underestimating HRC

I apologize for the length in advance – there is some stream of consciousness here, but this whole nomination process has made me pretty reflective on my past, and where I’ve come from and what I believe in.

I’ve got to admit, I was a pretty lucky kid.  My Mom and Dad started our family in the late 60’s in a crowded, dingy section of Norwalk, California.  The five of us (my parents, me and my two sisters) were pretty poor – my pops was driving a truck and doing odd jobs where he could find them, Mom was doing some accounting work.  When I was a few years old, they moved us into a decent part of Long Beach, not too far from Grandma’s house.  

Grandma was a big-time Republican, and I remember her and my father arguing politics from time to time. Of course, I never understood the issues they were discussing, but I knew they seemed to find it pretty important. And it was clear to my entire family early on that I was a political savant. Looking at a picture of Richard Nixon on the television screen, I started crying. My Grandma asked me why I was crying and I said “because he’s scary”. Turns out I was probably more knowledgeable about politics at 3 than I am now as a grown man.

Anyways, my Dad took a job in Sacramento when I was 6 years old and I’ve lived in the area ever since. My parents were always fitness freaks – ate well, exercised, played sports. And that’s why I consider myself to be a pretty lucky kid – I absorbed their interest in sports, and not just watching sports on television, but playing them. I played Little League, swam competitively, and even learned how to play tennis. I’d shoot jump shots on the basketball court for hours during the summer and play football with my friends most weekends during the winter.

My love for sports has been a pretty big influence on my life. Learning to play within a team, understanding how the disparate talents of individual players can mesh into something considerably more, how this meshing of talent can lead to victory against others who on paper had better talent – these were all important life lessons that I’m not sure I would have received outside of this little world of mine. To this day (now in my early 40’s) sports and competition is still an important part of my life.

When I was 12 (way back in 1978), my parents joined a health club for the first time. Up until that point, most “health clubs” were strictly about lifting weights – muscle gyms filled with Schwarzenegger-wannabe’s. This was completely different – they had a basketball court, the free weights were separated from the resistance machines. There were tanning beds, and an upstairs lounge with a full food menu. There was a big-screen television, video games and dart boards, a pool and a pool table. The mens locker room had a sauna and a Jacuzzi.

It was like Disneyland for a kid who was into sports.

Best of all, they had racquetball courts. Eight of ‘em actually. I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I’d even heard the word “racquetball” up to that point. Who spends their evenings in a 40 foot long by 20 foot wide by 20 foot high box?

Turns out, lots of people did. Every night, I’d watch the older guys and girls play round-robin matches on the courts that had the glass back walls.  Damn, they even played doubles! You haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen 4 large men play racquetball at the same time. 40 by 20 by 20 starts to look like a very small confined space.

But it sure looked like fun. So I took a few lessons with our club pro, and I was hooked. I was drawn to racquetball like Hurley to the Dharma Ranch Dressing.

After a few years, I was pretty damn good…and I started playing tournaments. I graduated from small tournaments at my own gym, to local tournaments, to larger regional tournaments, and on a few occasions national tournaments. I even played a few years at the professional event down in Stockton.  

I always loved the team aspect of playing baseball, basketball or football, but the bottom line was that there was only a marginal amount of influence one player could have on the game…on the baseball field you would come to bat three or four times per game, maybe make two or three defensive plays depending on the position you played. Racquetball tournaments were much much different.  It was you and one other person, locked in a small room – and the outcome often relied on factors other than pure skill. Tournaments are where you figured out how much fire you had in your belly…they were a test of endurance and stamina as much as pure talent. There were times when I would wake up the Sunday morning of a tournament, after playing seven or eight matches over the Friday night/Saturday preceding, and wonder if I would even be able to limp around the court for my upcoming semi-final or final match. But there was always the combination of a couple of painkillers, IcyHot, stretching, and a pre-match beer to get my body loosened up.  

It sounds funny, but there was always something very spiritual for me in these matches late in the tournament, when I was playing the best remaining players in the draw, wondering if they were really hurting as much as I was, whether I would break their spirit before they broke mine, whether I had enough in the cajones department to survive a war of attrition, then likely need to do the same thing an hour or two later.

I’ve gotta admit, early on in my racquetball “career”, there were times  where I couldn’t do it – I’d go into a match, get down early, try to fight back, but just gave it up in the face of superior talent and superior physical ability. But after a while, I learned a very important lesson – most of the other players I was facing had the same doubts, the same concerns about endurance, and the questions about their own mental toughness when you had your back against the wall in a match.

So I worked on changing my mindset - I’d work my ass off for every damn point, every game. If I showed my opponent that I wouldn’t concede an inch – over time they will have to question whether THEY had the guts to beat me. And some did…others (and occasionally much “better” players) didn’t.

About two years ago, I was lucky enough to marry a beautiful woman, a single mom with a young girl whose smile melted my heart. Subsequently, I adopted this amazing girl and have been doing the most important job I could ever imagine. But, as so many can surely attest, having a small child to take care of can put a major crimp in your social schedule, and can add a few pounds to the waistline. Racquetball, and exercise in general, became far less important. So I stopped playing.

That little girl is getting ready to turn five now, so recently my wife and I decided to join the local health club. Nice place, lots of tennis courts, and a good kids facility for my daughter to play in while we are working out.

And four racquetball courts.

Turns out, they have a racquetball league at this gym, and on a whim I decided to go ahead and sign up. I figured the competition would keep me interested enough to practice a bit, maybe see where my game was. In the back of my mind, I knew what I was really doing – seeing if I still had the stuff to compete, maybe play a tournament down the road and let my little girl see something that Daddy used to do really, really well.

First night (two weeks ago), I played my first matches in the league.  We would play two doubles matches to start out - I was paired up with a decent player, and we won one game, lost the other. Immediately, I had to go back on the court and play my first singles match – and I was paired up with a pretty good player.  Low A / High B maybe – good forehand, decent backhand – very good game in the frontcourt.

And here I was, wheezing like a Ford Escort with a blown cylinder. Two games into my “comeback” and my knees and back are rebelling to the extra 20 pounds I had put on during my hiatus. So I sucked down a couple of ibuprofen, drank some water, and discretely looked around to see if there was a defibrillator on standby. Immediately, the guy got me down 7-1.  I was having trouble getting him out of the frontcourt, and wasn’t even making him sweat – he moved me around from one side of the court to the other, front and back. I was hoping at that point to get 5 points on him.

Then he made his first mistake. He relaxed. He stopped drive serving and went to lob serves to my backhand. Slowly, I started to get a rhythm, hitting better ceiling balls that forced him out of the frontcourt. And once I took control of the frontcourt, I was determined not to give it back to him – since I didn’t really have my power game, I just finessed him. Lob serves, ceiling balls, pass shots to move him back and forth.  And I ended up beating him that first game 15-8.

The second game was much easier…mentally, he seemed to have already decided that it was going to be tough sledding. I won that game 15-5.

Man, was I psyched. I was back! Well, maybe not fully back, but I definitely got the bug.

So this past Tuesday night, I show up for week 2. I’ve dropped a few pounds, my legs are adjusting a bit and aren’t quite as sore. This is the week I’m going to turn it up a notch.

Again, we play two doubles matches, with split results. My singles matchup is against a lower level player, maybe a high C, low B. Nice guy, and a hard worker on the court.

First game, I get up on him pretty quickly – but he’s making me work hard for each point. The guy has a motor that won’t quit, and some balls I think he has no chance getting come back up to the front wall and I have to extend the rally another two or three swings.

After about 10 minutes of this, I can feel my legs wearing out.  Sonufabitch - this guy isn’t going to just “lay down” for a better player. He’s seeing me as a nice little conquest!  I’m not putting the ball away, and he’s getting everything. I feel like I’m running uphill for every point I get.

And he broke me. 15-8, 15-5. Shit. Back to the drawing board. Lots of work to do.

________________________________________________________________________

When I read liberal websites of late, there are heavily partisan people on both sides, making grandiose claims of the inevitability of their chosen candidate. And when I read things like “Hillary will quit on March 5th”, or “Obama’s way too far ahead in fundraising”, I just shake my head and laugh.  

Whether you like her or not, Hillary Clinton is a formidable opponent. And it doesn’t have anything to do with money or how many primaries or delegates she’s won. What it has to do with is her desire to win and overcome the obstacles that have been placed in front of her.  

This is a woman who has been unfairly vilified by the mainstream media for years, who has been hammered with every vile accusation under the sun by the right-wing machine. And she is a woman who had to absorb the heartache of seeing her husband’s infidelities broadcast to the entire world, and somehow being scorned for HIS indiscretions.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I would have been greatly inclined, after all that, to disappear quietly into public life, to avoid the snide remarks and haymakers that would continue to be thrown my way. But she didn’t…far from it.

This woman has become a very popular sitting Senator and has herself on the cusp of something I don’t think any of us could have foreshadowed in our lifetimes. She’s a survivor, and a truly remarkable human being. She would make a tremendous President of the United States, and I will gladly back her if she is the nominee.

However, I’m an Obama guy - I was on the Edwards train for a long time, and made the jump to Obama after my guy suspended his campaign. I think Obama’s is the right voice to get the people of this country energized and back in the process. In my heart, I really believe it’s about time the younger generation stepped up to grab the reigns of this country, to start pushing the old guard out and move this country away from the angry, partisan machine it has become. I think Obama is the guy to bring about that change.

But make no mistake, Obama will not win because Hillary is going to quit. He is going to have to beat her, period. She is that guy that kicked my ass on the racquetball court last Tuesday, but with infinitely more raw talent. She and her supporters are energized, and more importantly, they believe she can win. And Barack is not going to be able to just throw his jock out on the court and finish this thing off – he’s going to need to be brilliant. From now until the convention, if necessary.

It’s Been a Long, Long Time

Holy cow, how time flies.  Has it really been so many months??  With so much going on - Super Bowl, a rejuvinated Kings team, pitchers and catchers preparing to report, and Super Tuesday - there are plenty of things to write about.  Where to start??

*Blows dust off keyboard*

• Yesterday’s game was three quarters of pure boredom followed by 15 minutes of probably the most compelling Super Bowl play I’ve seen.  When Eli hit Kevin Boss for a 45 yarder to open the quarter, I felt the Giants had a very good chance to win that game.  Talk about coming right out and punching a team in the mouth in crunch time.  Even after the Patriots scored the go-ahead touchdown with a few minutes left, it felt like the Giants had a decent chance to win.  Why?  Because they had been the better team pretty much all day long, whether the score reflected such or not.
• Bill Belichick is a stubborn jackass and for once it cost his team.  New England’s offensive juggernaut was predicated on Brady’s ability to throw, throw, and throw some more.  Early in the season, it appeared that neglecting the rushing game was not going to be a problem for the Pats, since Brady and his receiving corps were good enough to make it work.  But when it comes to the playoffs, good defenses can figure out how to stop one-dimensional offenses.  Belichick’s refusal to attempt to establish the running game meant that the Giants defense could focus on pressuring Brady and playing the pass all game long.  48 passes and 16 rushes in a low-scoring, close game?  Are you kidding me?
• The most gratifying part of the Patriots’ loss?  Randy Moss still doesn’t have a ring.
• Super Tuesday approaches and it’s a damn good thing for Hillary Clinton that it’s not occuring on February 12th.  I’m guessing she comes out tomorrow with a slight lead in total delegates, but Obama’s growing surge of support and cash reserves mean he’s in this until the convention, unless he gets blown out tomorrow.  That appears to be less and less likely.  If Obama stays somewhat close tomorrow, he will continue to rack up endorsements and funds that Hillary will be unable to match.  Of course, Clinton seemed to be in trouble prior to New Hampshire, and pulled off a big win, so it would be crazy to underestimate her - but I have a feeling things will be fairly bleak for the Clinton campaign in the upcoming weeks.
• The Kings continue to fight their way to .500, which is the first step to actually talking about the playoffs.  This is one of the years though that they probably neeed to fight their way to .600 to be a playoff contender in the West.  The success of the current roster brings with it a few dilemmas, such as Brad Miller’s sudden trade value spike, and the future of Mike Bibby.  Ron Artest is still almost a lock to be traded by the deadline, but it’s quite possible Bibby hangs around through the remainder of the season.  Clearly, Francisco Garcia is the odd man out in the rotation due to the logjam in the backcourt and Petrie needs to reconcile that situation pronto.  Garcia is not a 5 to 10 minute guy in the NBA.
• Ah, yes - the end of football season marks the buildup to spring training.  My beloved Giants are clearly on pace to have one of the worst offenses the league has seen in the last decade, but the starting pitching should be good enough to be competitive most days.  Problem is, Bengie Molina is the odds on favorite to bat cleanup this season.  And that is a sentence that should never be uttered by a major league baseball team.  My pre pre-season over/under for wins by the Giants?  Let’s say 70 and hope for the best.

Four Games In

Last season, I was an unabashed supporter of the Eric Musselman regime.  Maybe I was fooled by his “greater than the sum of its parts” performance of his Warrior teams.   Maybe I was looking for the kind of youthful enthusiasm he brought in contrast to the walking corpse Rick Adelman tended to be during the waning days of his tenure in Sacramento.  Whatever the reason, I was ready for a fresh start with a new voice directing things for our special little jewel of a franchise.

What an unmitigated disaster that turned out to be.  I couldn’t have been more offbase if I’d worn John McClane’s sandwich board from “Die Hard 3″ in the middle of Oak Park on a Saturday night.

So I’ll try to temper my enthusiasm (or lack thereof) for the Reggie Theus era appropriately - I’ll stick to simple observations through the first four games:

Let’s start with the negatives:

• This team is going to stink on the road.  Of this, there is no doubt.  I’ll be happy if this team can play .400 ball on the road after the All-Star break.
• We may be witnessing a historically bad frontline.  When your bigs are neither big, long, or athletic it does not bode well for defensive success. 
• I’m not sure there is any tangible proof of this, but from listening to Reggie’s interviews I get the impression he could be a bit thin skinned.  And if this is true, that trait combined with a drill instructor mentality towards his players could be a bad combination,  especially staring down the barrel of a sub-30 win season.
• Geoff Petrie’s clearly not comfortable putting a roster together (primarily speaking of front court players) for anything other than a Rick Adelman-led team.  Mikkie Moore is a perfect example - here’s a guy that, while somewhat athletic, appears to bring very little on the court.  Subpar rebounder for his size, so-so defensively, hell I can’t figure out what exactly he does well.
• We still don’t know when Justin Williams will be back…and we still don’t know if he will get off the bench for Reggie Theus.  If Darryl Watkins can’t get consistent minutes, will Justin?
• The lack of a decent frontcourt puts so much pressure on Speed Racer, Cisco and Salmons (Douby too) to carry the load offensively.  Will these guys be able to handle the increase in minutes and the added pressure of really carrying this team to victory?
• This team is going to have to earn it’s home court advantage back - the fans are clearly not going to just give it to them.

Considering the ass-whoopin’ this team received in the first three road games, and going down 20 points in the home opener to a very poor Seattle team, that’s not a horrible amount of cons.

Pros:

• You have to add the caveat to all the cons listed above - it’s only four games.
• I love, absolutely love the continuing development of our back court.  Contrary to popular opinion, I don’t hate Mike Bibby - I just think he’s an average NBA player.  This team is in rebuilding mode, and Bibby needs to be taken out of the equation somehow to allow these young guys to continue to develop.  Injury now, trade later - whatever it takes, I hope Bibby can be moved sometime this season.
• Kevin F’ing Martin.
• Damn, Reggie just looks like a coach.  Visually, there’s something about him that commands a bit of respect.
• I can probably get tickets to the game at discount prices now.

Geez, that’s five “pros”, and the last two are a stretch.  Honestly, I can’t get too worked up about player rotations yet, as Reggie is missing four important pieces (Artest, Bibby, Hawes and Williams).   Once that group comes back, we’ll have a bit more firepower and depth.  This team won’t be worldbeaters this season, but it’s possibly the best young core of talent this franchise has seen in years.  And that will make the losses eminently more tolerable.

Sacramento Kings Preview

With the start of the football season and the baseball playoffs heating up, the first Sacramento Kings preseason game kind of snuck up on me.  Thankfully, I check in on the best Sacramento Kings site around each day so I was aware of the first preseason game for the hometown team last night.   I didn’t get to watch the entire game, but caught a good portion of it (and thankfully, Dish Network just recently added the high-def feed of Comcast Sports Net.)  A few random thoughts on the team’s chances this season:

• Reggie Theus is clearly trying to downplay expectations for this season.  When he’s talking about guys struggling  in practice, or being surprised by last night’s offensive output (”I didn’t think we’d score 50″), it’s pretty clear he prefers the Lou Holtz style of press management over the Eric Musselman style.
• The team was hustling on defense as if they truly believed their playing time is predicated on their involvement on the defensive end of the court.  I’ll believe it when I see it about a month or so into the season. 
• Kevin Martin picked up right where he left off last season - 27 points on 11 shots is borderline ridiculous.  I like the fact that he did quite a bit of damage with Durant guarding him.  That is an indicator that he wanted to stick it to the rookie a bit, which may also indicate a desire to be more of a leader on the squad.  That might be wishful thinking, but I think that’s what Kevin needs to do more of to make the leap.
• I’m still trying to figure out what Mikki Moore brings to this squad outside of another undersized front court player.  The guys rebounding rate over 48 minutes was mediocre last season, and I saw nothing last night that really impressed me.  I know he’s a hustle and energy guy and that might be needed from time to time (especially on the road), but over the 82 game haul I don’t expect him to be much more than a low minute bench guy.
• I love Justin William’s athleticism and rebounding as much as the next guy, and I would have liked to have seen him play more than seven minutes last night.  But he’s still a liability to you on the offensive end and in the team defensive concept.  This isn’t baseball, where a bad defensive player only hurts you occasionally but you get all the benefits of his positives.  This is the NBA, where that player’s weaknesses will be exploited each and every time down the court.  Guys like Rodman and Ben Wallace could get away with their poor offensive abilities because they were elite players on the defensive end.  Until Justin becomes at least adequate on the offensive side of the court and becomes an above average man and team defender on the defensive end, he shouldn’t be playing big minutes.  If he were showing off those abilities in practice, I assume he would have played more minutes last night.  Of course, he’s still young and will learn, but similar to Mikki Moore, I think he’s a guy we will see in short stints most times and occasionally in longer runs against certain opponents.
• In the past, I’ve been somewhat critical of the squad Petrie has put together because I just don’t see what exactly the team does well as a whole.  We’ve got big guys who aren’t big, but don’t really run either.  We don’t have a bunch of outside shooters, although there are a few guys that can put the ball in the hole.  Alternately, we don’t have a team full of aggressive drive and dish guys who attack the basket.  Defensively, we aren’t quick or big either.  In essence, this team does not cause too many matchup problems for the opponent on either the offensive or defensive end.  However, I could see this team playing a bit more of a run-and-gun offense.  Speed Racer, El Flaco and Ron-Ron can run the floor a bit.  Brad has lost some weight and looked significantly more mobile last night than at any time last year.  Justin and Mikki Moore can run, as can Douby and Kenny Thomas.  But that’s the thing…if you try to open up the offense, that means less Shareef, less Bibby and Miller and MORE K9 and Douby.  We will see how that works out.  Can Reggie put this type of offense together without getting the team’s doors blown on the defensive end?
• IMO, Petrie’s job security should be on the clock from now until the end of next season.  I know it’s sacrilege in the Sacramento area to make that kind of statement, but Petrie’s performance hasn’t exactly been stellar of late.  And how do we know that he’s capable of building a team for anyone other than Rick Adelman?
• Bottom line - if Theus is able to get these guys to at least TRY to play defense each and every game through the year, and plays an aggressive, more free-wheeling offense, I think this team has the talent to get 40 wins.  Is that enough to make the playoffs in the West?  Could be.  More likely, I’m guessing we are in the 33 to 35 win range and Theus makes his first appearance at the NBA draft lottery.

Odds and Ends - 9/24/07

• I’m getting a little worried that the Democrats are so focused right now on getting the troops out of Iraq (for good reason), that they are leaving themselves open to another line of attack during the ‘08 elections.  They are holding themselves open to questions of the long-term goals in decreasing the footprint of terrorism on the globe, and also on confronting Al-Qaida outside of Iraq.  Wouldn’t a winning strategy be not just a plan to remove our troops from Iraq, but a larger plan to refocus on Afghanistan and the Al-Qaida strongholds in Pakistan?  The leaders of the criminal organization that planned and executed the World Trade Center attacks still roam free 6 years after the fact.  I think pointing our national defense focus in this direction could deeply resonate with the American people.
• To show how nonsensical current polling is, John Edwards and Barack Obama by and large poll better against the top-tier Republican candidates (Romney, Giuliani and Thompson) than does Hillary Clinton.  Yet, Hillary continues to substantially outpoll Edwards and Obama in head-to-head polling.  How in the world can this disparity be so wide? It defies rational explanation.
• The fact that we let the crazy fuck from Iran not just enter our country but make speeches in front of the student body of one of our most prestigious universities exemplifies the true spirit of America.  As expected, he passed himself off as the innocent party in the simmering hostilities of our two countries.  Oh, and he says there are no gays in Iran.

Dropping Bonds is a Mistake

While not a complete surprise, the news that the San Francisco Giants were going to let Barry Bonds walk at the end of the ‘07 season stunned me.  The reality that this 15 year era of unsurpassed production on the field was going to be tied up in a nice little bow for the organization in two week’s time was a bit unnerving. 

Look, I get that the team didn’t want to go through the Bonds guessing game they endured the last off-season.  And I understand that the guy is a primadonna in the clubhouse, and the cloud of suspicion surrounding his use of PED’s is a distraction.  Furthermore, I get that he eats up a large amount of salary that could be spent on multiple younger players. 

But there are so many better reasons to bring him back for another season, both from a financial and entertainment perspective.

The most obvious reason is from a purely aesthetic standpoint.  Give me one reason I’d want to watch this Giants team next season sans Bonds.  The minor league talent we’ve seen of late looks to be nothing more than average to less-than-average MLB talent.  Schierholtz may be the exception, but I have a feeling he’s little more than a Feliz clone, and without the glove to boot. 

The free agent market is pretty weak, and while I do think ARod will opt out of his contract, he’s not going to be in the orange and black next year.  The guy is going to leverage himself to get 30 to 35 million on the open market per season.  The Giants brass was uninterested a few years back in pursuing Vlad Guerrero at less than half that cost - I have a hard time believing they will want to add a contract the size of ARod’s with Zito’s large contract already on the book from the last offseason.   And don’t forget, they will also need to pony up for Matt Cain and Tim Lincecum in the next few years.

The dearth of impact bats in free agency is only matched by the lack of quality arms, and this is an area Sabean may be able to exploit.  One thing the franchise has been able to do fairly regularly is stock up on quality arms with potential.  Lowry and Sanchez could bring back some young hitting prospects. 

But this is a team with numerous holes to fill - the infield is aging, with very little in the way of big league ready prospects waiting in the minors.  Notwithstanding Feliz’ occasional home run power and solid glove, his OBP is an anchor that should relegate him to the #7 or 8 hole.  The team could survive without any pop at first base if they were getting production from the middle infield.  But Jeff Kent is long gone, and Ray Durham is clearly done.

The bullpen is a mess.  The team is long in the tooth, and losing Bonds isn’t going to entirely reverse that - and the veteran players on this roster (Vizquel, Durham, Aurilia and Klesko) have limited trade value.

So this team is clearly a few years away from contending…or even contending to be contenders.

And if that’s the case, why not bring Bonds back for an additional season? Why not allow the greatest player of his generation, a player who has carried the franchise on his back for FIFTEEN years, a player who is still one of the best hitters in the game, take a season-long curtain call? 

Fact is, Sabean and McGowan are tired of dealing with Bonds and the issues that constantly revolve around this man.  But how long until the fans are tired of dealing with a team that does not have a credible power threat in it, much less a team that can produce runs through high OBPs and timely hitting? 

Stats-wise, the Giants are dead last in the majors in OPS this season, and by quite a bit.  Now in what business do you attempt to strengthen yourself in a certain area of weakness by ridding yourself of your one employee who is not only your best in that area of weakness, but one of the best in the entire industry?  It’s ludicrous - now the team has to not only make the strides to increase their power and run producing ability at almost every position on the field, but they’ve added a bigger hole at the one position they could truthfully rely on.

And does anyone have faith in Sabean and Co. to find the talent necessary to turn this offense around?  Have they shown any penchant for being able to evaluate a player’s performance in the batters box? 

This team made a mistake retaining Brian Sabean - and it’s compounded that mistake by letting Bonds go.  About this time next year, we will be looking back at one of the worst Giants teams of the last 30 years, and we’ll all be wishing for the days of Barry Bonds in the four hole.  From an entertainment aspect at the very least, but as the one guy who could have prevented this debacle from occurring at the very most.

Odds & Ends - 9/17/07

• The arrest and impending conviction of Orenthal James Simpson on multiple felony charges has a bit of a “getting Capone for tax evasion” feel to it, but hey, it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.  The guy needs to be behind bars, since he’s probably due to lop off a few heads (it’s been 13 years since his last decapitations, for goodness sake).  Don’t count on jury nullification on this one - at the time he was acquitted of the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman he was still a pretty sympathetic character.  That’s clearly no longer the case.  The upside for OJ here?  He can continue his unfinished “search for the killer” in a place that killers normally hang out. 
• So Sally Field’s anti-war statement during her acceptance speech at the Emmy’s last night is excised by the Fox censors, but Brad Garrett and Joely Fisher (stars of the Fox comedy “‘Til Death”) can do 90 seconds of blatantly sexual innuendo standup comedy (which I enjoyed, to be honest) and it goes untouched?  What the fuck is going on in this country?  Mistrust of the government (which the founding fathers rather preferred) is no longer politically correct.  The fact that it was Fox doing the censoring only compounds the stink on this issue.
• Trust me, Charger fans will be longing for the salad days of Marty Schottenheimer before this NFL season is over- Norv Turner is both one of the best offensive coordinators to ever coach in the NFL and one of the worst head coaches to every coach in the NFL.  The Chargers showed an ineptitude on offense last night that belies having some of the best skill position players in the league.  And the defense that was so stout last season looks Charmin-thin right now.  Sure, it’s early and the Patriots are a damn good team, but that was horrific.  Last year’s playoff loss to the Pats is likely to haunt Charger fans the way the 2002 NBA finals (and Robert Horry) haunt Sacramento Kings fans.

Odds & Ends

A few things floating through my brain this fine Friday afternoon:

• Like most people, I think the “cheating Patriots” story is a bit overblown.  And I also think that $500,000 is a lot of freaking cash, no matter who you are.  But if the best defense the Patriot supporters can make is “everyone does this kind of thing”, you know the league is probably right to take this seriously and nip it in the bud.  There are two things I think Roger Goodell was thinking about here.  First is the NBA’s problem with Tim Donaghy.  The NBA always seems to elicit the largest number of conspiracy theories, whether it’s the NBA’s dictating what teams advance in the playoffs (ludicrous), or that the referees purposely stick it to certain teams (less ludicrous), or give the superstars the calls your average player does not get (clearly true).  After the Tim Donaghy revelations came out, it just added fuel to that fire.  The NBA will have a very hard time maintaining the trust of their fanbase over the next few years, and that is something that Goodell clearly wants to avoid - turning a blind eye to blatant cheating to allow certain teams a competetive advantage on the field.  Secondly, I suspect there is a bit of a classist element to this - Goodell has come down extremely hard on NFL players who’ve run afoul of the law, and he needs to make sure he’s not seen as a pushover when it comes to management’s indiscretions.  Thus, you see a 5 game penalty for Wade Wilson and the current fines/draft pick loss for the Pats. 
• As if you needed any additional data, watching Belichick’s intervews today shows he is a sourpuss on the level of Brian Sabean,  Alex Rodriguez and Kenny Thomas.  If I had to have dinner with those four, I’d order the Prozac Appetizer and a bottle of whisky.
• Evidently, O.J. Simpson took a break from finding the real killer to attempting to retrieve some sports memorabilia. Hey, if you didn’t trust the po-po, you’d probably do the same thing right?
• Trust me, watch a few episodes of Mad Men (AMC, Thursday nights) and see what you think.  I’m eight episodes in (haven’t watched last night’s episode yet) and absolutely love it.  The one drawback to the show?  There’s nary a person in it to root for - by episode 10 there has to be a male with some redeeming qualities or I may need to bolt.  My vote is for Salvatore Romano, who seemed to be making the leap last week (in more ways than one). 
• I also watched the pilot for “Chuck” the other day, as it is available to Dish Network subscribers on an on-demand basis.  The show itself is not bad, the characters are likeable and the dialog is decently written.  I’ll probably hang with it for a few episodes and see how it goes.  If I’m fighting for TiVo space with my wife over “Gray’s Anatomy” though, “Chuck” will probably have to be a casualty.
• If you were Antonio Alfonseca and wanted to appeal your four game suspension for hitting Todd Helton, wouldn’t you use the “Shit, I have six fingers so I overgripped and it got away” excuse?
• Weekend football lock:  San Diego over New England.  Take the points and enjoy!

Office Bathroom Etiquette for Dummies

Having worked the last 12 years in an office, and being of the male species, I’ve killed quite a bit of time in the men’s bathroom.  And it amazes me how little today’s younger male office workers know about proper public bathroom etiquette.  So if you’ve always wanted to know a bit more about using the company’s facilities correctly, you’ve come to the right place. 

Now, I’ve never been in an office with greater than two urinals and two bathroom stalls (one handicapped).  So for larger venues, such as the men’s room at Arco Arena, take a look here, or contact the office of Larry Craig - (202) 224-2752.

Today, we are going to focus on about a half dozen of the most important rules for using the men’s room at your office.  Even the most green of men generally understand basic urinal policies (stare straight ahead, if you must converse do it briefly, etc.).  So we will focus mainly on the stalls.

• Rule #1:  THERE IS NO LAW AGAINST USING THE HANDICAPPED STALL.  I can’t reiterate this strongly enough.  For those of us who are better than average size, there is no point in using a stall that is barely bigger than an airplane bathroom.  I’d venture that any guy who bypasses the handicap stall because he’s worried about the .0001% chance that a wheelchair will be rolling in over the next ten minutes might have some serious self-loathing issues. 

• Rule #2:  GIVE THE NEW GUY A WARNING SIGNAL.  For instance, in my office there are two stalls - the closest one to the entry door is the Billy Barty special - aka, my non-preferred stall.  If someone is using that particular toilet, I can  see if it’s occupied right when I walk in the door.  The larger stall is the problem - there is no way to spot the telltale signs of a pair of cheap Payless wingtips with a pair of Dockers slumped over them.  Which means, I need a warning signal, before I decide to pull on the door, scaring the crap out of the occupant and pissing me off.  One little cough after the door opens, or rolling the toilet paper holder in the wrong direction works just fine.  I’ll happily come back later.

• Rule #3:  Speaking of Dockers, I understand that sometimes you need some extra leverage and may allow your beltline to drop to the floor - I really do.  But DO NOT LET YOUR UNDERWEAR DROP ALL THE WAY TO THE FLOOR.  I don’t need to see the neato boxers your old lady gave you for Valentine’s Day, or the banana hammock you wore on your most recent trip to the French Riviera. 

• Rule #4:  YOUR STALL IS NOT A CROCK POT.  It is important not to sit in a stew of your own funk for ten minutes.  Unless you like smelling like shit around the rest of your co-workers, toss in a courtesy flush occasionally.  If you are so uncoordinated that you can’t flush the toilet while you’re on it, you probably shouldn’t be roaming around with more evolved primates anyways.

• Rule #5:  DON’T REMOVE THE READING MATERIALS.  How the hell does this happen anyways?  Why is there a sports section hanging on the handicapped bar in the morning, yet gone in the afternoon?  Did it get flushed? 

• Rule #6.  The last, and probably most important rule - DON’T SPANK IT IN THE MEN’S ROOM.  Yes, every office has a hot chick wearing the painted on blouse and miniskirt, but that’s no excuse to uhm…strangle kojak in the office bathroom.  Murphy’s Law dictates that you’ll be halfway into the session when Grady from Accounting decides to pop into the other stall and violate rules number 3 and 4.  And that is always a buzzkill.

That is all.  Learn ‘em, know ‘em, live ‘em.